- Direct experience—the advice-giver was successful, has been doing it for years, offers many variations, and can distinguish many nuances in the situation
- They were taught by a known expert
- They talked to someone with expertise who learned through his/her own direct experience
- They observed someone else apply it and succeed
- They read it in a book
- They overheard a conversation
- It seems like a good idea
Above all, the advisor must clearly understand your situation and objectives. A good sign is that he or she takes the time to ask a variety of questions. The ease with which the advisor asks uncomfortable-to-answer questions is a plus. One who leaps to solutions is dangerous.
If they share an experience with you, most people will tell you how well it went. Nevertheless, always ask, “How well did it work for you?” Even if they weren’t totally successful, you can still benefit from the experience they did have by asking, “What do you think would have made a difference?” and “Why do you think that would have worked?”
Your ideas will be accepted more readily if you’ve already demonstrated success by using them yourself.
How to offer advice—-an investment in credibility
Credibility is one of your most important assets in business and in life. Not only do you need to trust others for the information they give you, it’s equally important that others know they can trust you too.
I recommend that when you offer advice, follow it with a statement of how you came by this knowledge. That way, regardless of whether good or bad results come from the advice you give, your integrity is always maintained. “Here’s something I learned from my own personal experience and it might work for you.” At least he or she knows where your information has come from. If you give advice that is just an opinion or something off the top of your head and it doesn’t work, he or she will look at you and say (or worse, think and not say), “Your advice sucks.” “You’re a loser.” However, if you say, “I read this in a book and it worked in this particular context, so it might make sense for you,” at least if it doesn’t work, in all honesty he or she will know that you read it in a book. You’re really not on the hook for this one.
When offering advice, state, “Here’s how I know this. . . .” If you don’t know what you’re talking about, do everyone a favor and keep your mouth shut. Maintain your credibility for the future when it counts. You don’t need to be temporarily impressive at the cost of your reputation that follows you forever.
Continue... to part 3: Beware of extremes
Employee Stock Options
