Excerpted from Business Black Belt by Burke Franklin
The Advice You Get and the Advice You Give
A significant component of 'listening skills' is your choice of who you listen to and what you believe.
I recommend that you qualify the source(s) of your advice and in so doing, qualify the advice you get as well as the advice you give.
The cobbler’s kids have no shoes
I learned a few years ago never to take advice from someone who hasn’t been there before. You wouldn’t hire a fitness trainer who is fatter than you are, would you? Leaders must set an example in the area they claim as their expertise.
You’ve heard the saying about the cobbler whose own children have no shoes, meaning he doesn’t practice what he preaches. If the cobbler’s kids go barefoot, obviously he doesn’t care about them, so why would he care about you? And if his shoes aren’t good enough for his kids, why should you buy them? There’s a real problem if someone doesn’t use their own stuff or follow their own advice—especially when they’re offering or selling it to you.
It’s important to get the right advice only from the right people. Unless you’re doing market research, where every opinion contributes, remember to weigh the quality of your advice according to its source. Ask someone in a position of leadership—an active expert in that area. Also, ask more than one expert (a second opinion). And whatever information you gain, be sure to filter it through your own experience and knowledge. In other words, don’t deny or discount your own direct experience. Often, business leaders ignore their intuition in favor of conflicting opinions and, usually, regret it.
In the past, when I had a question, I would seek advice from everyone, regardless of their qualifications on the subject. For example, I would pose a technical marketing question to lots of people. I would weigh their opinions equally no matter what they knew or how qualified they were. On the other hand, I used to give my opinion about all kinds of things only to be upset when people didn’t believe me (even though I might not have known what I was talking about anyway). I should have said, “Look, I don’t know about that subject. I’m not an expert. But if you still want my opinion...
”Unfortunately, many people who have no idea what they’re talking about are happy to give you their opinions anyway. The ones who really make me laugh are the “consultants” who’ve just graduated from school but have yet to get a real job. Don’t ask everyone for their opinions. Just because someone has a college degree, has written a book, or leads a seminar doesn’t mean he or she is an expert. In fact, you may have more expertise than they do!
Asking the wrong people for advice is a big waste of time. And if you take their unqualified advice, it will be a big waste of money too! The time invested in qualifying your source far outweighs the time wasted in recovering from a mistake made with bad advice.
There is a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot.
— Stephen Wright, comedian
There’s a BIG difference between opinion & experience
You must distinguish between opinion and fact. Often, a person offers an opinion but states it as if it were an experience. Many people give advice without distinguishing its quality. You can determine the quality of the advice you receive by simply asking:
How do you know that?
The explanation should give you a good idea as to where the advice sits between opinion and experience. If someone has been through the same situation and appears to be honestly successful, then you can make a pretty safe bet the advice is based on fact.
Continue... How I rate the quality levels of advice
A significant component of 'listening skills' is your choice of who you listen to and what you believe.
I recommend that you qualify the source(s) of your advice and in so doing, qualify the advice you get as well as the advice you give.
The cobbler’s kids have no shoes
I learned a few years ago never to take advice from someone who hasn’t been there before. You wouldn’t hire a fitness trainer who is fatter than you are, would you? Leaders must set an example in the area they claim as their expertise.
You’ve heard the saying about the cobbler whose own children have no shoes, meaning he doesn’t practice what he preaches. If the cobbler’s kids go barefoot, obviously he doesn’t care about them, so why would he care about you? And if his shoes aren’t good enough for his kids, why should you buy them? There’s a real problem if someone doesn’t use their own stuff or follow their own advice—especially when they’re offering or selling it to you.
It’s important to get the right advice only from the right people. Unless you’re doing market research, where every opinion contributes, remember to weigh the quality of your advice according to its source. Ask someone in a position of leadership—an active expert in that area. Also, ask more than one expert (a second opinion). And whatever information you gain, be sure to filter it through your own experience and knowledge. In other words, don’t deny or discount your own direct experience. Often, business leaders ignore their intuition in favor of conflicting opinions and, usually, regret it.
In the past, when I had a question, I would seek advice from everyone, regardless of their qualifications on the subject. For example, I would pose a technical marketing question to lots of people. I would weigh their opinions equally no matter what they knew or how qualified they were. On the other hand, I used to give my opinion about all kinds of things only to be upset when people didn’t believe me (even though I might not have known what I was talking about anyway). I should have said, “Look, I don’t know about that subject. I’m not an expert. But if you still want my opinion...
”Unfortunately, many people who have no idea what they’re talking about are happy to give you their opinions anyway. The ones who really make me laugh are the “consultants” who’ve just graduated from school but have yet to get a real job. Don’t ask everyone for their opinions. Just because someone has a college degree, has written a book, or leads a seminar doesn’t mean he or she is an expert. In fact, you may have more expertise than they do!
Asking the wrong people for advice is a big waste of time. And if you take their unqualified advice, it will be a big waste of money too! The time invested in qualifying your source far outweighs the time wasted in recovering from a mistake made with bad advice.
There is a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot.
— Stephen Wright, comedian
There’s a BIG difference between opinion & experience
You must distinguish between opinion and fact. Often, a person offers an opinion but states it as if it were an experience. Many people give advice without distinguishing its quality. You can determine the quality of the advice you receive by simply asking:
How do you know that?
The explanation should give you a good idea as to where the advice sits between opinion and experience. If someone has been through the same situation and appears to be honestly successful, then you can make a pretty safe bet the advice is based on fact.
Continue... How I rate the quality levels of advice
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